Be it deciding the stream for higher studies or surviving the last day of graduation, waiting for the job response or being on the verge of getting hitched, the pressure of procreating thereafter or choosing the best nursery school for the life hence created, the question is, are we ever settled in life?
Lately, I have been dealing with these two terms- ‘Settled and Settler’ like anything! Surprisingly, the thin line of demarcation that separates a ‘Settler’ from being known as ‘Settled’ is something that Aunt Pam, Uncle Scrooge, and Aunt J have proudly ignored.
7 days before my flight:
Aunt Pam: Oh my darling Sups, I heard you are leaving for Canada?
Me: Yes aunty.
Aunt Pam: What will happen to your old parents.? What if one of them gets a heart attack?
Me: (by the time I could mentally rush through the updated health insurance of my parents, latest doc visit, quick Visa policies)
Aunt Pam: Life is uncertain dear…(a long sigh)
Me: But Aunty you are here ..you are family for us. Moreover, it’s just a 14-hour flight!
Aunt Pam: Me?? Hello! (suddenly she gets a call) Hi Sonny, yea I saw your picture at Big Ben. You all look so cute. (she turns towards me ). My son on the other side settled in London (proud voice). Have a safe flight!
On that Day
Uncle Scrooge: Hello…Sweety. I heard you are leaving today? Which country are you going to?
Me: Canada Uncle. ( I was about to say thanks for calling and wishing)
Uncle Scrooge: What? It’s so cold out there. I can bet, you won’t be able to survive. What about Job? You are taking a big risk. My daughter went abroad with an appointment letter. How will you survive with a baby? Call my daughter, she will help you out. She is settled there for so long.
(Unfortunately, the call never ever got through)
30 days later
Aunt J: Oh my god.. you stay in a 2 room condo and got a job within a month? People have to struggle a lot here. Staying in stacked places, doing odd jobs and what not! You people settled so fast! Do you have a car too?
Me: Not yet.
Aunt J: (I could hear a sigh) Okay, so, so …my only suggestion would be, take it slow!
(Was it a compliment or a warning?)
5 months and on…
So, who am I today?
Well, a happy immigrant and a proud settler. Be it the winters or the daily struggle, neither of it has or will, shun me down. There are no substitutes for mother or motherland, but there do exist better avenues to weave a better future. Why not take it, right?
P.S. I still get many generous calls like these who judge me with what I have, ignoring the effort/struggle behind that. Calls from all the good people, well-wishers, experienced people, who think I just got lucky in settling down. The only difference is, their calls now reach my Voicemail!